Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Ciao cari,

I'm ok.. still alive. A lot has happened again. I went to Croatia, because feverishly sick and then Suvi came here for awesome 4 days. I have a lot of pictures to show and... most of all, I'm happy.

Sometimes changing the environment is a good idea. Padova is probably at the moment the most brightest on this time I've spent here. I love being here and if someone would as me now, I would say I wouldn't want to leave but I want to go home. It's a strange feeling and like I said to Matthew some time ago... it would've been easier to keep on disliking Padova. But as I'm also very addicted to euphoria, this is a better choice.

Now I'm studying. I have probably just two exams to do and I'm completely screwed anyways. One professor hasn't answered to my e-mails anything. I've been trying to send me few and no answer. On his personal professor-page it says that meetings can be arranged via e-mail. Well what to do? One exam I'm studying for all the time and another one... well I'll be horrible in it but I'll go and try anyways. Maybe I'll get pity points :)

Yesterday Giulia and her boyfriend were at the house. Reetta and I made pasta and some tomatosauce which succeeded to look like vomit. But it was good vomit :P Giulia was cute. She was her chipper self and apparently they had drank something. Then I were talking about.. she leaned more close and whispered: "Well actually I'm happy because Ale (boyfriend) is here." I keep wondering how will they do when she goes to Spain for a year. For me everyone keeps telling "yes but you are going away... just have fun." I remember few years back when everyone kept telling that distance is no deal. There's the internet and everything and there's many people doing it. I guess it was the first honey-moon stage of internet dating... then they realized that having someone in the same room is defenitely not the same as having it on the otherside of a wire... kilometres away.

Today I talked to Fabian about leaving. The most strange thing is probably that you are used to the surroundings around you and the people that you don't actually talk to so much, but they are in the same circles... when you get back, they might not be there. Like now... I'm not going back to Laurea. I'm going to Metropolia. And coming back here will most definitely not be the same. Erasmus people leave, people move and the most important of all, I won't live here anymore. I won't bike along these streets like I'm biking them now.

I'm happy. I'm euphoric and I'm something I haven't been for all this time of my being here. I'm happy.

Even when change is sometimes not easy and even when you are happy somewhere, changing at the moment of the complete happiness might guarantee the continuing happiness. Not everything is suppose to continue.

Euphoria keeps people young. "Euphoria and craziness", like someone just told me.

No comments: